ONE ON ONES

One on Ones in the DTS

One on ones are an intentional relational connection of a staff person to a student to help the student cooperate with God to get the most from the DTS. The one on one is just one of many program elements designed with this purpose in mind.

GENERAL CHARACTERISTICS OF A ONE ON ONE

  • The one on one happens at a set meeting date and time every week (30 to 60 minutes)
  • In the first one on one the staff and student clarify the purpose of the one on one, the student’s responsibility in the one on one and the staff’s responsibility in the one on one.
  • Student comes to the one on one sessions prepared to have a conversation
  • Staff person comes prepared to listen, ask questions, encourage and give feedback.

THE STUDENT’S RESPONSIBILITY IN THE ONE ON ONE

  • The set one on one time provides an occasion for the student to process aspects of their DTS experience.
  • Student is to freely share what they feel comfortable to share.
  • Student is to come to the one on one time having prayerfully prepared for what to talk about.

QUESTIONS TO HELP STUDENT PREPARE FOR THEIR ONE ON ONE

You may want to create some questions to help the student reflect on their DTS experiences so they can identify one or more topics to talk about in the one on one (There are already some included in the "One-on-One Handout Download" above). Below are a few sample questions based on the broad categories of the Purpose of the DTS. You and the student will want to create others.

Comment on how you are doing in each of the following:

  • Actively taking your place in the DTS body to hear and obey God to do ministry
  • Growing in your relationships with God and others
  • Relating to and learning from those who are different from you
  • Growing in understanding/ability to share the Gospel and extend the Kingdom
  • Understanding YWAM as well as opportunities available to me in YWAM

THE STAFF’S RESPONSIBILITY IN THE ONE ON ONE

  • Staff person begins the one on one by asking: “What would you like to talk about in thistime?”
  • Staff facilitate an awareness of God throughout the one on one.
  • Staff are to actively listen by reflecting back to the student you have heard them.
  • Staff are to ask clarifying questions regarding something the student is processing. Look for a question that helps the student discover or connect to more of what the Holy Spirit is saying/doing.
  • Staff are to ask questions to help draw the student out further.
  • Staff are to ask follow up questions from past conversations if relevant.
  • Staff are to give specific encouragement and other feedback to the student.
  • Staff are to look to connect the student to others who might be able to help them.
  • Prayer together should be some aspect of the one on one time.

Note: One should not wait until the One on One time to the confront the student about some behaviour of concern. Confrontation should happen as close to the incident as possible and by the people involved.

CLARIFICATIONS OF THE STAFF’S ROLE IN RELATION TO THE STUDENT

  • The staff person is responsible to take these initiatives outside of the set weekly meeting
  • To pray for the student
  • To intentionally build relationship with the student
  • To look for opportunities to give consistent encouragement to the student
  • To confront the student when appropriate and necessary.
  • The one on one staff person is not THE discipler of the student rather they are to make an appropriate contribution to the discipling process.
  • The staff person is NOT responsible for the growth of the student

Other Concerns

  • Student must NOT be required to share all with their assigned one on one person
  • Student should be free to talk to or pray with guest speaker or anyone else without the one on one person present.
  • The one on one person does not have right to know everything about the student and therefore no personal information the student shares with others should be routinely passed on to the one on one person.

ACCOUNTABILITY

Our goal is to help the student learn how to take responsibility for their own growth. This involves the student:

  • Evaluating aspects of their life and relationships
  • Evaluating aspects of their progress in the DTS
  • Identifying a step he needs or wants to take
  • Deciding he will take this step
  • And finding someone to ask him if he is following through with his decision.

In an area where the student knows he is weak and in need of help he is to ask someone to hold him accountable to the decision he made in the process outlined above.

In general it is not necessary or even preferable that the one on one person is the one who holds the student accountable. It is best the student learn the life skill of asking someone to help him in this process.

In the case a change in the student is needed in order for the student to continue in the DTS or to successfully complete the DTS, staff are to take the initiative to help the student set steps for change. In this case the staff person would hold the student accountable. Lack of follow-through on the student’s part would have consequences.

ONE ON ONES & ACCREDITATION

All DTS One-on-Ones must be recorded for the purpose of accreditation. Please make sure each student brings their DTS Workbook / Manual to their weekly One on One and that both staff and student fill out and sign the One on One form each week. For a deeper look at the accreditation mandates for DTS Staff & Students visit the DTS Assessment & Accreditation Page.